The cat with the blue eye

This is a story about judgement and autism…

I live in a world of golden-eyed cats. I have grown up with cats, all with beautiful golden eyes. Everyone I know loves beautiful golden-eyed cats. I go to the shelter to find a new cat. As I go to pat a friendly little girl, she looks up at me with her beautiful golden eye, and then turns her head, and her other eye is blue. She has one blue eye, and one beautiful golden eye! I pat her and scratch her behind the ears, quickly falling in love with her. So I end up adopting her and taking her home. I am totally in love with my odd little kitty with one blue eye. So I take her to the vet, and the vet says “EWWW! Your cat has a blue eye! Yuk!”. That is judgement. My noticing she had a blue eye, and adoring her anyway was not. Clear?

After he gets over the distain of handling a blue eyed cat, the vet says, “Well, she seems healthy,” and nothing more. No further comments about her eyes at all.

Then I have to move, and it turns out that where I move to – all the cats have blue eyes. The people next door to me come to meet me, and say, “Oh, look at your cat’s beautiful blue eye. And then she turns her head, and I hear” “EWWW! Your cat has a gold eye! Yuk!” But then that is followed by “You need to take better care of her blue eye…” And I look puzzled, and ask “What’s wrong with her eye? It looks fine to me.” And I look at their cat’s blue eye, and back at mine, and to me they look the same. And I have no understanding. So I take her to the vet, and the vet (after the “EWWW!” part) says, “She seems healthy, but you really need to take better care of her blue eye.” And I ask, “What’s wrong with her blue eye?” And all he does is repeat “You need to take better care of it.” And I ask, “What do I need to do to take care of it?” And he answers with distain “You’re a smart person, just take better care of her eye”. So I go home and Google every which way from Sunday trying to find out what I need to do – and nothing! But my kitty seems happy and healthy, and I love her… It’s just that every time anyone comes over, the first thing they say is “You really need to take better care of your cat’s blue eye”. And nobody will ever tell me how – they just keep telling me how smart I am, and how I will figure it out. But then I notice that people want to be around me less. And I hear people whispering “That’s the lady who doesn’t take care of her cat’s eye”. And they sneer at me and avoid me, and it hurts. But I still only wish I understood, so I could just enjoy them, and enjoy sharing my cat, who I love…

This is being autistic…

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s